New York

So I just realized that I haven't posted pictures from my New York trip yet. My bad... Pictures to come soon. Promise!

Teaching...

So, I've taught Primary since the day I graduated High School. Yep, five long years; save the six months that I lived in Provo, for which I was the ward pianist. When I started going to the Singles Branch down in Nephi, I naturally figured that they wouldn't give me a calling since I lived in Payson and just commuted to church each Sunday. After a lovely adventure of getting my records transferred down to the branch I was told my the Branch President, Pres. Bateman, that they had TWO callings in mind for me and that they would let me know which one they decided was right for me.

In the mean time, I've been the ward pianist again, without being called, because the girl that was playing moved and I was asked to 'fill in'. I'm still playing without being officially called. But it's not too bad and it gives me an excuse to practice a little bit more.

Now, to the point of the story. On Mother's Day I was asked to substitute in Relief Society. I'd never taught anything other than Primary so you can imagine that I was super nervous to say the least. I made sure that I was way over prepared and when it was all said and done, I felt like I did an okay job. The sisters in the Relief Society said that I did, so I'll take their word for it. Once class was over, President Bateman came up to me and asked to see me in his office. I, of course, already knew that he was going to issue me a call, but as I walked into his room, I silently prayed to myself that it wouldn't be a teaching position. I figured that my calling was going to be ward pianist since that was what I'd been doing for two months.
So we sat down in his office and President Bateman turned to me and said that they wanted to call me as a Relief Society instructor!!! Horror!! I just knew it! I'm going to be known as the worst relief society teacher ever! So after I sat there for a minute and thought it through, I of course agreed to accept the calling. I couldn't tell President Bateman no even if I wanted to...

Now, even after five years of teaching Primary, it obviously hasn't become apparent that I'm just not a teacher... But then if you listen to Mavanie, I must be a good teacher if that's what I keep getting called to do. I don't know if I agree with her or not, but I'm certainly going to try and do my best.

Now I just need to get over my bad case of nerves when I have to talk in front of people...

More of Connor!

Playing with Dad and his balloon.

He had to touch. :)

That was good frosting!

Sitting with Mom and my Newsies hat.

Spring Semester

This semester has been cram packed with things. Going to school full time is a blast and I'm loving every minute of. A lot of things have been changing in my life and I've had to make a few decisions about things.
I'm loving all of my photography classes and I'm learning tons. I've even purchased myself a new digital camera to accommodate the new skills and techniques that I've been learning. My two art history classes are pretty intense, but my professor is AMAZING and I get to be her TA, which worked out since I quit my other job so I could go to school full time. Sculpture class is kind of kicking my butt, and I know for sure that I'm not a sculptor... but I'm broadening my horizons so that is good.
I've also made some new friends this semester! One in particular has had a definite impact on my life. Mavanie is an amazing person and I haven't met anyone quite like her. She is always so happy and always makes my day. She is also a fellow photographer so we have that in common among many other things. Mav has helped me get out and socialize more and meet more people. I've become friends with her roommates too which makes hanging out at her apartment a lot of fun. She's also convinced me to leave me home ward and attend a singles branch down in Nephi with her. I've only gone once so far, but it was really nice and I was ready for a change. Teaching Primary for five years will wear on any single person. Not that I didn't love my Primary kids.
I also have the opportunity to go to New York with the Art department at school. We are going for the whole week of Spring Break. I am so excited! I've never been to New York and I've always wanted to go. We get to go to several of the major museums and visit several local artists. Then we get a day where we just get to go play. Expect MASSIVE amounts of pictures to come!!! I don't really know any of the other students that are going, but I'm not going to let that hinder me having a great time. Courtney (my art history professor) is going as one of the professors, so that will make it a lot of fun too. She'll be able to talk to us about all the art we're going to be looking at.
Anyway, life is good. I'm super busy all the time, but I'm loving it. I've also started submitting some of my photography to art shows and galleries. I'm even having one displayed starting on Monday in a cafe in Provo with some fellow students.
Say hello to spring time and sunshine ... hopefully. =)

Thinking alike

Today, I went to visit my friend, Holli, and give her a Christmas present. I'm a photographer, so of course her gift was a picture. Now, when I handed her the picture she chuckled and said something about us thinking alike. I wasn't sure what she was up to, but she went to retrieve her present to me. And guess what it was?! A picture frame! She knows that I take hundreds of pictures, but I do not frame many of them. We laughed at how we thought alike when it came to the other person and it pretty much made my day that we know each other well enough to feel that way. I have never had a friend quite like Holli, and this past semester has brought many new things for the both of us. There have been good times and rough times, but sitting chatting with her today I knew without a doubt that I still could count on her just as much as I ever have. Sometimes it just takes a round-a-bout way from what we've done before.
So, I'm just going to say how grateful I am for the friends I have and all that they do for me. I not only have Holli, but I also have sweet Camille. Camille, who is an angel on earth, has been there for me more times than I can count. There isn't anything that I can't work through once I've talked to Camille about it. She always listens and helps me understand the 'whys' of life. Life isn't as bad as it seems sometimes and family and friends make life so much more bearable.

Life and it's curve balls...

Don't you just love life when you're going along, thinking everything is fine and dandy and then it throws you for a curve ball and you have no idea how you got there or what to do about it...
It just so happens that I received one just last week. I had been going along this past semester, enjoying school and new friends. One friend, in particular, I felt that we were developing a great friendship and that it was coming right along. I felt like 'they' were encouraging the friendship and how we treated one another and were enjoying being friends as much as I was.
During the week leading up to finals everything was a little stressful and both my friend and I were spending many hours on campus. It also just so happened that the classrooms I was in were also the classrooms that they were often in. I will admit though there were several times when I ventured to be around this friend. I got the impression that they didn't mind having me around and I enjoyed watching them work on their school projects. It was my impression that I could learn from them by watching them work.
So now to the curve ball. The week of finals I didn't see or hear from this friend. I knew they were busy with finals so I just wished them luck through a text and figured that I would talk to them after finals were said and done. Well, one night I was sitting on Facebook and this friend started chatting with me. They said that there was something they wanted to talk to me about. I figured they wanted to do something after finals or they needed my help with something. Boy, was I ever wrong!!
They told me that I was invading their space and that I was suffocating them. That the friendship had progress way too fast for them and that it made them uncomfortable. I totally was blown away and had no idea this was how they had been feeling. I, of course, felt terrible that this was how they felt about our friendship, because that was not the vibe or impression I had been getting from them the whole semester. I wasn't sure what to say, so I apologized that things had made them uncomfortable and that I would try and give them all the space they needed. Since then we have not interacted.
Now, I'm still pretty much at a lose at what happened. Maybe I'm just a moron and totally misread everything. Or maybe everything was fine and one day I did something that they didn't like. I will easily admit that I did act like their shadow on occasion, but only after they told me that they enjoyed hanging out for the whole day. And maybe that meant JUST for that day and none afterwards, so I suppose that could be my fault, but I'm still confused at WHEN things went wrong... Did things go wrong at the beginning, the middle, or at the end? I honestly felt that during the semester, they were furthering the friendship as much as I was. So, what happened? Were they just enduring the whole semester and hating every minute of it and just faking it for my sake because I was lonely and needed a friend, or is there more to the story? I don't know and it kind of is stressing me out. I never intended to make things bad in the friendship but maybe I did without even knowing it. Maybe I wasn't paying enough attention to all the signs or maybe I, simply, just messed up. I don't know. I know my social skills are not that great, but I didn't think that they were THAT horrible...
So, I do not know what is in store for this friendship. I do hope that things can be fixed and it goes right this time. But, I honestly, don't know how I should act the next time we meet. I don't want to suffocate them again, but I don't want to keep too much distance that they don't think I want to be friends anymore. So, it's easy to say, well do the middle then, but I'm not sure what the middle is when it comes to us.

So, there is my curve ball. Probably sounds like nothing to anyone else. I, however, have never liked being on any one's bad side or cause waves for anyone. So when I feel like I have, then there is a problem. It is my problem, this is true. And since I haven't talked it out with anyone I needed to get it off my chest... I fear only time will provide an answer and I worry what that answer might be.

The End of Summer

This summer has gone by so fast and I don't feel like I've accomplished much. Then I stop and think - well I survived a motorcycle accident, had knee surgery, still have my job as my employer's company is falling apart, sent my little brother off on his mission to the Ivory Coast, had good times with my best friend, Holli, and get to enjoy as much time with my family as I want. So even though it wasn't the summer I had completely planned on, it still was a summer where I learned and grew. I think that's a good thing.
Now school is starting once again and I think I'm ready for some more adventures. I know a few of them are going to be a bit harder than others, but I'm hoping that I'm ready to take on whatever comes my way. Life is just one day at a time and doing our best each day. So here's to doing my best and hoping that things will work out for the best. I just have to be patient and accept the plan that the Lord has in store for me.